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Welcome back to the heads together podcast. Thanks for joining me again. You know, I love it to have you here with me. So on today's episode, I want to share some real talk around the things that I would do differently. If I was starting my business over again right now, I think it's really important that we reflect constantly on the journey we've been on to get to where we are, because I think that helps us make decisions for the future. Everything that we've done, we've learned from certainly my outlook for my business now is completely different to the way it was when I first started my first business. But that said, I do think that there are some things I can share with you that I would definitely have done differently. Now that I've got the hind sight of where I am now. So it's super important to learn as we go along and pivot and make changes. But at the same time, there's a few fundamental things that I wish I'd known at the beginning of this journey that would definitely have informed some of the decisions I've made along the way. So let's dive in.
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Welcome, welcome to the heads together podcast, I'm Gill Moakes. And I am obsessed with cutting through the noise when it comes to growing your business each week via intimate coaching conversations and inspirational stories, I share what it really takes to get the results you want, in a way that feels right to you.
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I am all about attracting higher ticket opportunities, building authentic relationships, and creating the abundant full fat version of your dream business. I mean, how many of us have even away creating a light version of what we really want? The thing is, I honestly believe, when you're outstanding at what you do, there is no limit to what you can achieve. So are you ready to put our heads together and make it happen? Let's go.
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Okay, so the first thing is,
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this is a really big one, I would have started the business I actually wanted to have in the first place. So you know, I've talked about this loads before about how so many of us really do beaver away at a business. That's an absolute light version of what we really want. You know, because for so many reasons that we talk about, you know, that playing small, the imposter syndrome, the lack of validation, the massive entrepreneurial fear that sets in, you know, the fear of failure, the fear of disapproval, the fear of having to be visible, all of those things can so often cause us to create this light version of the full fat business of our dreams. And that's exactly what I did. So the first business that I started, was as a virtual assistant. I would almost I don't know if I ever really believed this, but it's definitely the story that I told anyone who would listen. And that was this, I would tell people that I had no ambition to be in the limelight. I just wanted to be someone who's supported amazing women. I wanted to be this the person who
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was just supporting other people make their dream businesses come true.
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And I want to make something really, really clear being a VA is a fantastic business. I actually think that if it's the thing that you love it if it's your zone of genius and that you're amazing at it, like my VA is it's absolutely the right business for you.
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But it wasn't the right business for me. And it was a it was a lie. Every time I said to someone I don't want to be in the limelight. I might as well have been saying I'm scared to try because that's what it really was. I felt like for me being a VA and I work with coaches so I was a VA to an amazing health coach, a couple of amazing business coaches. And whilst I in
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joyed that work, there was a slow realisation for me that
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I was supporting their dream businesses to come true
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to I was bringing their wildest visions to life alongside them.
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But I wasn't doing that for myself, I also came to a realisation that, particularly as a business coach, I already had so many of the skills that I needed to be an outstanding business coach. And I don't say that to be
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big headed, or
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to bang my own drum, although I am bagging my own drum. And I am saying that I'm an outstanding business coach, because I have all of the validation I need for that, within myself, and from the clients that I work with. So I don't have a problem saying that. But back then, I didn't believe that I was that I would be able to make that work, I didn't believe that I would be able to get high ticket clients that would pay for my coaching. I didn't believe that those things were open to me, I thought those were
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businesses that other people could have. Not me, my role was to help them get to where they wanted to be. And a big part of it, for me was a huge fear of being visible. I'm sure I've shared this story before how I blocked most of my friends and family on social media, when I first started my business, because I was kind of like, I was just so self conscious. And I was so terrified of anyone thinking, you know, God, if you see what God is doing, who does she think she is? doing that? You know, and I got really, really self conscious about it. And I was terrified of being visible that way. God, you'd never have got me on video, you'd never have got me talking like this back then.
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So I guess what I'm saying is that when we step out onto an entrepreneurial journey, it's really important that we do this inner work at the beginning. So that we do make the right choices so that we do follow a path that is going to lead to the business, we actually want to own and run the business that's going to really serve to
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allow us to fulfil our purpose, right? Being a VA for me, didn't allow me to fulfil my purpose because I was lying about what my purpose was. And it's only through doing this deep work around my own mindset. And around getting clarity about the business that I actually want to own and run. And the people I want to serve with this business. And the things that I do want to do and don't want to do when it comes to growing a business. Only now.
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Do I consider myself to have the business I actually want. It feels like everything into the roadmap, because my journey was I went from a VA to a online business manager, to business consultant, and now to a business coach and consultant, or mentor, which I prefer actually I like the word mentor way better than consultant.
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And it really is only now that I get to say, Yeah, this is the business, this is the one I want. And this is the business I'm excited about growing. This is the business that I see no limit for.
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So that's something I would do differently, I would have spent a lot more time at the beginning of my journey, just getting clear on what I wanted, why I wanted it. And making sure that the decisions I made back then aligned with what I genuinely wanted, not what I thought was available to me, not what I thought other people would approve of. Right.
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The second thing I would have done differently. And this is something that I've fallen back in love a bit with LinkedIn recently. And this got me thinking about the fact that I wish when I was starting my business, that I had been way more intentional around building my network. I follow some really rubbish advice. I'm not going to name the person but there is
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someone on predominantly on Facebook, weirdly, who touts around a LinkedIn strategy at about basically just spamming as many connection requests as you possibly can get out in a day
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and then
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Putting out literally the most ridiculous amount of content that how anyone would ever keep up with that posting schedule, I have no idea.
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And that would be there the era the answer to success on LinkedIn? Well, I think you know, this was years ago, by the way, this is not in new one that I have interacted with recently, or anyone who's currently in my circle or my network.
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And I, but years ago, I thought that was oh, yeah, that sounds good. That sounds easy as well, because she, this person was advocating not even putting a connection message would you believe.
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And just literally just hitting hitting send, just send as many as you can to as many people as you can.
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And
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that's what I did. So I built a network, I now have like so many connections, who I don't know, personally, and they're not meaningful connections. There's not, they're not people that I did research on, or could add value to particularly, or people who I thought might be interested in what I do. You know, they're not even people that where I'm interested in what they do. So recently, I've been doing a bit of a reengagement piece on LinkedIn to just try and swap that out. I'm trying to unpick a bad decision really, this is this is a podcast episode of Jill's epic fails.
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So that's an interesting one. Yeah. So now I've I've got a much some much better resources around LinkedIn. And I'm really kind of deep diving into my network and kind of, like I say, reconnecting with the people who I'm really genuinely interested in connecting with. And, as always, any kind of thoughtful, meaningful interaction pays off, but it takes time. So it's just you can't have everything. I could do tonnes of outreach on Facebook and, and Instagram if I wanted to. But it's so meaningless to me, and it doesn't bring business results. So I dabble in a bit of Instagram, just because I like the pretty pictures. But in terms of strategy,
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LinkedIn is really the platform that I enjoy being the most. And I'm really enjoying being really intentional about expanding my network. So this is, here's a challenge for you. This week, just go on to your LinkedIn profile. And just have a think just log into LinkedIn, have a think about? In what way would you like to expand your network?
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Or possibly prune, dare I say, prune your network down to a more engaged community of people that you're actually connected with? Because I found it fairly refreshing to do this over the last few weeks. And what I am doing is that I'm genuinely reaching out with something to say, to appeal to people, but it's not a lot of people. So I'm not it's this I'm not spamming anyone, I'm, it's genuinely forging connections with people I'm finding interesting, I'm not even looking at it, particularly through the lens of is this a potential client? For me? It's much more a lens of is this someone I can learn from? Is this someone who's going to kind of widen my horizons on that topic? So I challenge you this week to have a think about that, especially that last bit, how about reaching out to a few people who are really kind of putting some good content out there or a topic that you're genuinely interested in, whether it's your business subject or not, just start widening that network with a lot more intention. That is, and that is the second thing I would have definitely done differently, I would have not spammed all these hundreds of people and created this network of,
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of strangers, a lot of them are strangers to me, and I don't want it to be that way. I want it to be authentically people that I'm connected to who are interested in me, and I'm interested in them. And on that note, the third thing, this is something I definitely would have done differently, I would have completely skipped all of the in person networking events that I went to over the years that I absolutely hated. I really don't like networking events in person networking events, I find them so contrived, I find it I don't have any problem. You know, you know me, I'm not a shrinking violet. You know, I'm not a shy person. I am actually quite naturally introverted, which people always find surprising. So I find it quite exhausting to go to
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networking events, which is probably why I don't like them. But I also don't like the contrived pneus of of the situation. Now, that doesn't mean it isn't right for everyone. And the point I'm trying to make here, you know, I have clients who their absolute main source of new prospects is from the networking they do.
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And they are damn good at it, and they enjoy it. So for them, it's the absolute right strategy. But the problem is for me, I don't like it, I don't enjoy it. And
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I did it because I guess I was just emulating what I thought successful business owners do.
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But I never enjoyed it. And if I could go back, I would not have done that I would have spent my time doing something else probably probably be more intentional on LinkedIn.
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Does that sound like a LinkedIn commercial? I'm really not. I think there are a tonne of ways to grow your network around your LinkedIn is one of them. LinkedIn is a tool. And in person, networking events are a tool to use. And it's a case of finding out what works for you and what you enjoy. Because that's when you'll do it really well. If I never if I didn't do in person networking that well, I'd be the person who would sneak off and spend ages redoing my makeup in the lose, you know, like,
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I can remember actually doing that also, should I just share one funny thing as well, I remember once getting into my car, after a networking event, looking down, I realised I had my trousers on inside out. So I'd shared the size of my butt with the entire night networking event. And the Yeah, maybe it's PTSD that I have that makes me think how much I hate networking events. I've actually got PTSD from that one event where I was dressed like a tramp. Anyway,
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oh, number four, I have five things by the way that I'm sharing with you these five things I would have done differently. If I was starting my business over number four is I would have set myself way more stretching goals than I did. And I would have been very diligent about breaking those goals down into the micro tasks I needed to take each week to get to where I wanted to be. Because I do that now. So now I'm very diligent about setting myself goals. And breaking that down into I know to the day, what I need to do to achieve the goal that I want to have completed by the end of 2023, for example. So
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I guess,
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I would have just been way better at doing that. At the beginning, everything would just go at its own time, I didn't have really specific goals with timeframes on them or anything. So things would take as long as they took. And when I think about what I achieved now in my business versus what how long that would have taken me to achieve back then I am so much more productive. Now. I'm more focused on doing the things that are actually going to take me closer to where I want to be the needle moving stuff. And anyone who's coached with me any any of my clients will know that phrase of, you know, are you focusing on the needle moving stuff? Or are you focusing on busy work? Just busy work for the sake of being busy, which is what I used to do all the time. And I can still, it still happens now. It still happens now? Well, I'll say, Oh, my God, I'm so busy with so many tasks in Asana. Oh, and when that happens, I really am quick to spot it and say, Okay, hang on, hang on. Why am I so busy being busy? What's the what are the needle moving things I need to achieve today? What can I actually delete from this list and forget about for six months, because it's a nice two that I'm not even that committed to doing right now. You know, so I think just really regularly checking in with yourself on on the stuff that's filling up your calendar, and making sure that you're not losing sight of those bigger stretch goals, and the micro tasks you need to do to achieve them. And that's the important part, breaking down those goals into the actions that you need to take and then breaking those actions down into the micro tasks that you need to complete. To get there is so, so important.
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And then the last thing I just want to share is a little bit about
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is kind of, I guess, really the crux of this, what would I do differently. If I was starting over? I would be obsessed
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I would have been as obsessed then as I am now, on being who I am, and doing what I love.
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So, I wish that I had been as authentically me in those early days, as I am now. And sometimes they wonder what my business would look like now, if I had been. And I understand that, you know, it was a god, I'm not, I'm not saying none of these things are things that well other than the trousers inside out. But the rest of the things aren't things I necessarily regret, because they've all been that learning curve that have brought me to where I am today.
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But certainly, I just wish I'd had the confidence and the courage to be who I was, and be comfortable with that and to be visible to stand up to claim what I genuinely wanted what, and that was to be a coach, I wanted to be a coach.
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And I was scared to admit it. Because I didn't claim it for myself, I allowed impostor syndrome, and I allowed the opinions of others to hold me back.
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So I wish that I had focused back then 100% on being true to myself true to what I want. And if you're listening to this, and you're feeling like your business, isn't that full fat version right now of what you truly want. Or maybe you're thinking, Oh, my God, I can't pivot again. You know, this is crazy, I keep changing my mind, I can't, I can't, I can't, I just want you to think about it. And think about how, whose opinions matter most to you.
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When it comes to your business,
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and if it is someone else's, then you need to really look at that. Because for your business, your opinion, your genuine desire, should be taking precedence over anyone else. So that's something I just wanted to share. Don't, don't hold back from going for what you actually want. Don't go for a pale, a pale imitation of what you want. Go for the big one, start the business you actually want grow the business you've, you're dreaming of right? pivot to the thing you actually want to spend your days doing. For me waking up every day being able to have incredible conversations with the most amazing women who I coach, there is nothing I can't I cannot believe that I'm so lucky. Sometimes I have to pinch myself. But I'm so lucky to earn a fantastic living doing the thing I love. And that's what I want for everyone, because I believe that is available to everyone.
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A big part of the reason why there are so few people who can actually say that, who can actually say I'm doing exactly what I want to be doing
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every day
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is because people don't allow themselves to claim it. They don't allow themselves to accept that it's available to them. But it is.
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Okay. Well, I hope that's helped. I hope there's some sort of nuggets in there that you might find helpful. This kind of coaching around mindset is really where I feel I add
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the most value to my clients. Yes, we absolutely consult on business strategy and the do this thing. Next part. But for me coaching around this part of your mindset,
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the part that gives yourself permission to do the things you really want to be doing is huge. And if it's something you would like to explore with me, you can always apply for a breakthrough session with me. The link will be in the show notes. It's Jill moakes.com. Forward slash apply. I'll leave it there but I will see you again next week. Have a fan tabulous week. Bye for now.
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I hope you enjoyed this episode, and that getting our heads together this week has filled your mind with what's possible. If you love the show, would you do me a massive favour please? Would you leave a five star rating on Apple podcasts? It would really help you put more heads together
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to reach more ears and expand more minds until next week bye for now
Transcribed by https://otter.ai
