Gill Moakes (00:01.237)
Hey Kim, welcome to Heads Together Podcast, how are you?
Kim (00:05.199)
I'm very well, thank you. How are you?
Gill Moakes (00:07.425)
Good, it's so good to have you here. It's been a while since we spoke actually, we haven't caught up for a while so I'm really happy to have you on, thank you.
Kim (00:17.486)
Thank you, I'm really happy to be here. Thanks for having me.
Gill Moakes (00:21.273)
So for the purpose of our listeners, I would love it. Oh, Lena, can you just delete that? I don't know why I keep saying that lately for the purpose of our listeners. Why the fuck else would I be talking? It's a bloody podcast. Can you take that bit out, Lena? Thank you.
Can I get you to introduce yourself and just tell our listeners a little bit about who you are and what has brought you to what you do today? Because you have a really like dual aspect in a way, but maybe not so dual. I'd love to hear a bit more about how you've got to where you are right now.
Kim (01:02.174)
Yeah, absolutely. So I'm a doctor. I'm also a deep transformational coach and a mother and a wife and the rest of it. And I've been a doctor for many years and I have seen a lot, heard a lot, been very privileged to be in a position where I've seen people at their most vulnerable and I've really seen what suffering is as opposed to what people think it is. And I've been passionate for years now about really looking under the hood.
Gill Moakes (01:17.77)
Mm-hmm.
Gill Moakes (01:24.786)
Yeah.
Kim (01:30.89)
You know, what's really going on and working from that point, really, in terms of healing people and helping people. I've been passionate about helping people since I was a child, natural transition into medicine. Particularly over the last at least 10 years, my bag has been about really treating people as an individual that they are, listening to where they're coming from, and finding out what is going on.
Gill Moakes (01:39.734)
Mm.
Gill Moakes (01:53.389)
Mm.
Kim (01:58.074)
underneath the hood that is leading to the spectrum of disease, otherwise known as disease, that is presenting. So from a physical point of view, that looks like what has gone wrong years before the disease started from an immunological, gut health, nutrition, sleep, I practice very helistically, it's called lifestyle medicine in this country, looking at the pillars of true health as opposed to disease, health, symptom, absence, if you know what I mean.
Gill Moakes (02:05.965)
Bye.
Gill Moakes (02:27.073)
Mm-hmm.
Kim (02:28.31)
So this has been my passion for years, not only treating people as individuals, but really looking what's going on under the hood that's causing the problem, rather than dealing with symptoms, labels, diagnoses, one after the other. So I've been doing that for some time. And as time has gone on, as healthcare has progressed,
Gill Moakes (02:47.957)
Yeah.
Kim (02:54.114)
disease levels skyrocketing, patient numbers going up, it's become fighting fires left, right and center. And it has become necessary to, in a lot of circumstances, dole out drugs, dole out diagnosis, just try and help as many people as possible. And it becomes increasingly more difficult to sort of spend that time and to really establish what's going on. And so I...
Gill Moakes (03:01.887)
Mmm.
Gill Moakes (03:15.329)
can imagine. That must feel quite frustrating, I should think, if that's your passion is to come at it from that angle, the kind of pressure that you must be under to get people in out through the door, prescribe in out through the door, that must be really frustrating for someone like you.
Kim (03:32.402)
Yeah, it was it was frustrating for me for years because I refused to treat people as a label as a diagnosis You know historically when you do the ward rounds in hospital It's like the dvt in bed one and the pneumonia bed two and i'll be there going So you mean mrs so and so in bed two and mr. So so in bed one because so yeah, so for me That's that was a frustration for many years um So I got to the point where I would burn out time and time again, I would
Gill Moakes (03:38.758)
Mm-hmm.
Gill Moakes (03:50.122)
Wow.
Kim (04:02.466)
get stressed, I would overwork, I would do all this just to try and deliver the kind of healthcare that I wanted to deliver. And, you know, we've all been at that kind of level in our career, and particularly in my profession, before something breaks, something has to change. So for me, this was when I had my babies, because for those, you know, those as mothers, it changes everything, it changes our perspective on life.
Gill Moakes (04:19.158)
Hmm
Gill Moakes (04:29.201)
It does.
Kim (04:30.806)
where we've been, where we're going, our priorities change overnight, our whole sort of aperture changes. And obviously we have some time out from what it is that we're doing to step back and to think, what am I doing? How am I helping? And your health starts to matter on another level because you start to realize you're responsible for another human. So you've got to start looking after your health.
Gill Moakes (04:43.837)
Yeah, that's so true.
Gill Moakes (04:54.911)
Mmm.
Kim (04:58.334)
And the other thing that having children, I find brings up in you is all your triggers, all your mental stuff that you might have managed to ignore, suppress, whatever, until then there's no getting away from that when you have kids and you're sleep deprived. And so I delved into that opportunity every time I had a kid and cumulatively led to me really studying things like functional medicine, root cause analysis of disease.
Gill Moakes (05:06.667)
Yeah.
Kim (05:27.626)
lifestyle medicine and really starting to help people from a more holistic mindset but starting with myself and My health and then my mind and it took for me being broken Absolutely broken on another level twice until I got the message And decided to do the work and when I did the work on me, I was then able to do the work for other people So that's what led me on the journey. I've been on to today
Gill Moakes (05:35.021)
Hmm.
Gill Moakes (05:46.977)
Wow, wow.
Gill Moakes (05:54.474)
Wow.
Gill Moakes (05:58.413)
And so, so just thinking about timeframes. So when was it that you, when did you kind of have this realization that you couldn't just do the work you were doing for the NHS? You had to find a way to help people on your terms, perhaps might be a good way of saying it. And what did that leap look like for you?
Kim (06:22.678)
Mm-hmm.
Kim (06:28.007)
I started to educate the doctors around me and the nurses around me doing workshops of things in work, teaching them about fundamental aspects that they're previously unaware of because we're not trained in medical school. Nutrition, gut health, microbiome, sleep medicine, circadian physiology, blew their minds and it helped them embrace their health and then as a team we've helped to bring that to our patients as well. It's a small scale but I have to start somewhere.
Gill Moakes (06:44.361)
Mm.
Gill Moakes (06:55.509)
Yeah, absolutely.
Kim (06:57.952)
And that's been transformational and that's led to me creating the workshops that I now deliver online for a wider population in aspects of true health. But it wasn't really until I started looking at my mental health where the big shifts made a difference, not only for me, but in how I show up in my work and for my clients and patients as well.
Gill Moakes (07:21.448)
Yeah.
Kim (07:22.15)
I nailed the diet and the microbiome and the nutrition and the sleep, but there's still... things weren't changing until I decided to go there and do the deep work on my mind. And that just changed my whole life. Changed my perspective on everything that I'm doing, how I show up in what I'm doing.
Gill Moakes (07:32.571)
Mm.
Gill Moakes (07:38.537)
What did that look like? So what, sorry, what was the deep work that you did? Did you go and train or did you, was it just kind of your own research and going deep into this side of things?
Kim (07:55.138)
So I was fortunate enough to be coached and then mentored by some of the best coaches in the world. It was obviously part of my journey that was meant to happen and it happened over a number of years. And I mean, pre me doing the work, you wouldn't recognise me. You know, I was anxious. I was a procrastinator. I was a perfectionist on another level. I had sort of OCD tendencies. I needed to control.
Gill Moakes (08:05.517)
Wow, yeah.
Gill Moakes (08:13.906)
Really?
Kim (08:22.778)
everything just to feel safe, to feel okay. I was apologizing for myself. I was judging myself like all the freaking time and it was never good enough and I was just burning myself out trying to be everything and do everything and then underlying realizing that I wasn't good enough anyway and I wasn't safe anyway and so I did the work, the deep transformational coaching that I experienced.
Gill Moakes (08:26.375)
Mmm.
Gill Moakes (08:31.254)
Hmm.
Kim (08:48.17)
was revolutionary for me. I literally, these programs in my mind that I was running, I didn't even know I was running, dissolved, literally dissolved. Like I just let go of fear. I let go of fear. And all the ways in that it showed up in my life, in my relationships, in my, I didn't even realize in the way that I parent my children, one thing when my mentor said to me at the time is like, children will...
Gill Moakes (08:55.837)
Yeah. Wow.
Gill Moakes (09:02.753)
Mm-hmm.
Gill Moakes (09:08.409)
Mm.
Kim (09:17.09)
never really succeed in doing what you tell them to do, but they will never fail to do what they see you do. And I thought, oh, yeah, yeah. And I thought...
Gill Moakes (09:23.742)
Oh, that's powerful!
That's really powerful.
Kim (09:30.578)
I thought, that's so bloody right.
Gill Moakes (09:33.721)
Mmm.
Kim (09:35.01)
And that was part of the inspiration for me to go there and to do the work. And I thought, it's not about me controlling circumstance or people or ensuring this or fixing that or fighting. No, no, it's about slowing down. It's about who am I being? It's about how am I showing up? Am I showing up authentically or am I showing up in a way that's just surpassing my fear?
is just trying to suppress my imposter syndrome, I need to be enough to be valued, to be loved, all this. It was about letting go of all of that. And the mother it made me is the mother I wanna be. And the doctor it made me is the doctor I wanna be.
Gill Moakes (10:17.837)
Wow. So you went from...
Oh, I love that. So you went from feeling completely broken really by this, by being inside a container almost where you were never able to win, you know, with what you had to work with. You know, it was always going to be impossible for you to work in the way you wanted to necessarily. Actually, Leda, take that out. We can't diss the NHS too much. I'll just start that sentence again.
So you went from being really completely broken in terms of burnout, in terms of, you know, just not functioning in the way you wanted to as a parent, as a wife, as a doctor. And yet this really deep coaching that was completely transformational for you has just changed everything. It allowed you to show up, like you say, as the parent you wanna be, as the doctor you want to be.
So what came next then? Because I'm assuming, because I know you as a deep transformational coach yourself, what was that journey then from, oh, this is an amazing experience to, I want to be able to facilitate this kind of transformation for other people.
Kim (11:45.27)
Yeah, for me it was an organic one. So I started to, I was trained in the various modalities of transformational coaching, formally and informally, as part of my journey. And I've been trained in what I call somatic methods for about 10 or 15 years. This is things like EFT, something called matrix re-imprinting, which is a bit like IFS. And I brought it all together and I just started coaching people because I thought, I get this now.
I can bring this to other people. And it became quickly apparent to me that I had a real gift in doing this. I was holding space for people who were having incredible life changing transformation as a result of the coaching that I was doing for them. And because I was being me, and I was bringing in all of the modalities that I'm trained in, but my level of experience and a whole lot of me,
Gill Moakes (12:16.131)
Mm.
Kim (12:42.086)
As opposed to who I'm trying to be or who I should be or whatever. It was very and it's very organic Exactly, and I found that because I'd let go a lot of my stuff and There wasn't a narrative in my mind when people were talking to me at all So I was able to show up completely with them for them and hold that space for them That was part of the reason why people were having the transformations that they did so I did it and I did it and I did It again, I thought this is this is massive like people are having
Gill Moakes (12:45.257)
Yeah, bringing your own lived experience.
Kim (13:11.55)
incredible transformations. People are coming back time and time again and referring friends and family. My coaching business took off almost overnight and it never stopped. I've never advertised because I've never needed to. People have just come organically because of the shifts that they have.
Gill Moakes (13:25.769)
People, um, can't-
Yeah, I'm going to have to ask you that because I know there are people listening who are like, damn, you know, like, how has she just got it to take off like that? How has that happened? Because what I see a lot at the moment is that people are completing their coach training. And then this harsh reality of finding clients is hitting them. And it's something that they're struggling with. And I want to caveat it by first saying that I want people to just listen to
really carefully to something you said just now, which was that as soon as you realized that you wanted to be a coach, you got your training. So you did your own training. You, you, um, you learned how to be a great coach and then you did something. Amazing. You just started coaching. And I think it's going to sound really ridiculous, but I do think that there are so many people who are always stuck getting ready to get ready.
Kim (14:20.622)
Mm-hmm.
Gill Moakes (14:28.805)
Um, and they're working on their website and their marketing plan and their, all of these things, which are all absolutely fabulous and great to have. And as coaches who want to build big thriving practices and potentially scale to big thriving businesses. Well, yeah, there's, there's going to be a time and a place for all of those things. But I think that it's really caught before the horse with that, with a lot of people. And
Kim (14:38.562)
Mm-hmm.
Gill Moakes (14:55.649)
for most coaches, if you can just straight out the door, just coach as many people as you can, so that you're getting better and better at that skill and getting better and better results. And you said yourself, you just started coaching people and those people referred other people to you because you were that good. And that's the non-negotiable, isn't it? That's the non-negotiable as a coach. People can complain and whine all they like about how hard it is, you know, to...
Kim (15:02.99)
Mm-hmm.
Gill Moakes (15:24.053)
grow their business, but actually it's about being really good, getting really good results for your clients. That's what's going to grow your business. So that just had to kind of put that in there because I was so happy that you just said, you know, I trade and then I just started coaching people. Right. So, but, but I really do want to unpack a little bit about how, how did it take off aside from getting these referrals? You didn't.
Kim (15:40.17)
Yeah.
Gill Moakes (15:52.873)
You didn't market yourself, you didn't particularly shout about it. Did you, do you specialize in a particular type of coaching? Is there a particular methodology or a particular kind of person that you work with the most or, you know, what, what does that look like for you?
Kim (16:18.954)
Okay, yeah, so to your first question in terms of going out there and coaching and getting clients, I was taught from day one, you wanna be a coach, go coach. So for me that looked like coaching, having conversations, conversations with people about not about who I am and what I do and how I do it, but about who are you and what are you suffering with right now and how can I help you with.
Gill Moakes (16:31.008)
Absolutely.
Kim (16:47.266)
So one of the main lines that have helped me in my coaching journey is serve first. Serve first. So it's about the person in front of me that I might be sat next to on a bus. I might be on a phone call with them. I might sit next to in a bar or whatever it may be. And they're an individual and they have a story and they wanna be heard. And...
Gill Moakes (16:55.291)
Mm.
Gill Moakes (17:11.129)
Mm.
Kim (17:13.246)
I am here to hear them and to hold that kind of level of space for someone. And not many people are used to having that completely non-judgmental space held for them. And people have put up in that space and from that space I'm able to help them. And I've found that organically they've then gone, I need this in my life. I can see how this could transform my life. Let me know how I work with you. You know, we don't get clients, we create them and we create them by serving first. And that's always been my motto. Not only...
Gill Moakes (17:22.298)
Mm.
Kim (17:41.026)
as a business strategy, but because that's why I'm thinking doing it to help people, you know, I wouldn't be here from day one if I didn't. So that's served me well. To the second part of your question in terms of the type of coaching that I do, I do deep transformational mindset coaching predominantly. So what that is, is it's a lot deeper than standard coaching that may work in the realm of there was a problem.
Gill Moakes (17:44.797)
Absolutely, yep.
Kim (18:09.326)
coaching around the problem through the problem, looking at strategies to deal with the problem. Deep Transformational Coaching works deeper than the level of that. So there is no problem, there's just a perception. And there is a reason why that perception is there. Okay, and it'll be seated in one of what we call the three primal prisons of the human mind. Okay, so these are.
Gill Moakes (18:32.297)
Ding! I love that. The three primal prisons of the mind. So good. Go on. Mmm.
Kim (18:39.422)
Number one, inadequacy. I am, fill in the blank, not enough. I'm not clever enough. I'm not pretty enough. I'm not good enough. I'm not a good enough mom. I'm not a good enough whatever. I'm just not good enough, okay? That's the biggest one that I see, okay? And what happens is people are running these programs from a very young age and they're quite often unaware.
either of the program or the extent of which is running their life. It started to become part of their personality. It's affecting how they show up in their relationship, in career, as a parent, you name it. Okay? And they develop certain what we call behavioural adaptations. Okay? So these might be perfectionism. Because if I can get it perfect, I can prove that I'm good enough. People pleasing. If people like me, they'll see... They won't look under the hood and see that I'm just not good enough.
Gill Moakes (19:24.384)
Mm-hmm.
Gill Moakes (19:33.589)
Right.
Kim (19:34.434)
imposter syndrome has its roots in inadequacy because if I was if I was inadequate how am I imposter in life I'm not so it feeds into procrastination if you're not if you're not good enough then what have you got to worry about you're just gonna go and do your thing because you've got nothing to prove you've got nothing to compensate for so anyway
Gill Moakes (19:54.901)
Yeah, what are you waiting for? Yeah.
Gill Moakes (20:00.03)
Mm.
Kim (20:01.206)
That's the biggest one. The other two primal prisons of the human mind that I uncover through the process of the deep coaching are insecurity and scarcity. So insecurity may show up again, there's certain behaviour adaptations such as checking, checking again, perfectionism, OCD kind of tendencies.
Gill Moakes (20:10.925)
Mm-hmm.
Kim (20:23.586)
Fear for no reason, irrational fear, worrying about this and worrying about that, needing to control people and circumstances so that I am safe and so that I can keep everybody else safe because fundamentally the world is not safe and it's my place to ensure that it is. And I can't let that drop because I let that drop, oh, we don't survive because fundamentally I am living out of the box of I or it or the world is not safe.
Gill Moakes (20:32.446)
Mm.
Gill Moakes (20:39.669)
you right.
Gill Moakes (20:51.97)
Yeah.
Kim (20:52.67)
And that runs people's lives. It affects their relationship. It affects how they show up. It affects, this is what I mean, it's deep roots. Because it's not dealing with one problem. It's dealing with what the perception is that led to that problem. And then when we identify through the process of deep coaching, what the deeper level belief box, context, whatever it may be, is.
Gill Moakes (20:56.458)
Mm.
Kim (21:20.246)
We then go through the poster, which is dissolve it. I mean, literally dissolve it. And you can see, you can start.
Gill Moakes (21:26.913)
So how, what do you mean by that? Tell me what you mean by dissolve it. So what's, what does that feel like as a client?
Kim (21:36.642)
So a client may come for example with, so I work with professional athletes for example, so they might come with, they're playing the game, they're doing their thing, and then every now and then when certain things happen, they jam up with fear. They don't wanna let people down. Or they don't want people to see that they're just not good enough essentially. So they might overwork, they might keep getting injured, or they might not put themselves out there and take the risk on the shot, whatever it is they need to do to win, because of fear.
Gill Moakes (21:53.889)
Mm-hmm.
Kim (22:06.014)
And they know that and they've done the sports psychology and they know the tricks and the tools, but it keeps showing up and they don't understand why. Okay, so through the process of deep coaching, we will uncover the roots of the inadequacy, where it came from. This is not psychoanalysis, it's not psychotherapy, it's not therapy, it's not counseling, it's coaching. And from that space, when it all becomes bare, what it is that they fundamentally believed about themselves, we start to explore how true that is.
Gill Moakes (22:06.043)
Mm-hmm.
Gill Moakes (22:13.558)
Mm-hmm.
Gill Moakes (22:20.416)
Mmm.
Kim (22:36.042)
similar to Byron Katie's methods, Peter Crone's methods, we start to explore how true that actually is. And we start to explore evidence they may have accumulated as to why they think that is the case. And through the process of the coaching, we dissolve the whole concept. The whole concept. And the reason I use the word dissolve is because it literally goes...
Gill Moakes (22:43.226)
Mm-hmm.
Kim (23:01.426)
It literally goes, it's not a trick, it's not a tool, they don't have to go and do something, there's no method that they have to go through every time they're triggered into, it dissolves. And what people feel, viscerally, is such an incredible sense of freedom. Right, often you'll say to somebody, how do you feel? They'll say, free. I just feel so light. I feel so loose. I feel like, oh, I can let so much go. They just let it go, and they're like, holy whatever.
Gill Moakes (23:01.664)
Yeah.
Gill Moakes (23:16.853)
Mm.
Gill Moakes (23:23.201)
I was just going to say light. That's the other one.
Kim (23:30.83)
I can go do the thing. I can go be me. I can do what I want to do. I can be who I want to be because I've got nothing to compensate for and I never did. And this is where people start to heal their past as well in terms of how they judge their past as being wrong or should have been different. We start to go there and we pull the whole thing up at the root to the point where people just become very present in the here and now and fair enough.
Gill Moakes (23:43.244)
Hmm?
Kim (24:00.662)
They don't know it, they feel it because it's a gnosis. And freedom is the product, if you will, freedom, mental freedom from the constraints of the mind has its ripple effect in all areas of their life. And we, so first of all, we identify it, then we dissolve it, then we start to explore and integrate what life looks like in the absence of it.
and it's just, it makes me emotional, it's beautiful. It's beautiful. And it can't go away because it's gone. So it's not like, oh, I'm gonna go back like I was. No, because that wasn't who you were in the first place. That's who you're pretending to be.
Gill Moakes (24:32.714)
Yeah, what a process.
Gill Moakes (24:37.716)
Mmm.
Gill Moakes (24:41.889)
And that's always a fear. That's always a fear. Yeah. And but I think with any coaching, there is this fear that, oh, you know, it's all right all the time I'm seeing you or talking to you, but how will I manage, you know, when I've got to just cope with this on my own. And I think actually that's, I think what's beautiful about this kind of coaching is like you say it's, it's
nonsensical to even think that way afterwards because it has actually gone and there has been a complete not it's not even a reframe it's a realization isn't it
Kim (25:19.966)
Yeah, yeah, absolutely. There's no sort of mind game to play to get out of it. And people, you know, depending on how old they are, they've been winning these programs for some time. So the essence of the belief dissolves and then life will trigger them. And they, for a period of time will be like, Oh, hang on, that triggered me because of this, but that's not true. And they just let it go. And then they let it go and they let it go. So people really start to
Gill Moakes (25:30.163)
Mm.
Gill Moakes (25:34.581)
Mmm.
Kim (25:47.054)
understand the inner workings of their mind to a point they can actually watch their mind doing all what it was done previously on autopilot and still be okay and go do the thing anyway. It's like a separation from the inner workings of the mind that they can still show up as them. And one of the things that I see as people go through that process is they come into the process judging themselves, judging others, judging the world because they got the memo from the universe that knows how.
Gill Moakes (25:56.182)
Yeah.
Kim (26:15.402)
that says they know how everyone should behave and how everything should be. And as they go through the process of coaching, they stop judging life and others because they recognize everyone's on their journey doing what they're doing and it actually bears no bearing to them whatsoever, just the way it did. And then they start recognizing their own mind and they start noticing how much their own mind was judging others and themselves in line with this belief of I need to be enough or I need to be safe. So then they start
Gill Moakes (26:19.074)
Mm.
Gill Moakes (26:30.935)
Mmm.
Kim (26:45.282)
judging themselves for judging. And that's a hurdle that we go through in the coaching. We stop, when we stop judging ourselves for judging, we allow the mind to do whatever it's programmed to do and we get on with the thing anyway. We no longer identify with it. And that's where the real power comes in. And really for me as a coach, I'm as a doctor, my job is to do what I do, but also to leave somebody in a place where they don't need me anymore.
Gill Moakes (26:48.167)
Right, oh god yeah, absolutely.
Kim (27:11.158)
because one, their problems have dissolved, and two, they have such a level of understanding of their own mind, they can watch it, they can have sympathy for it at times, but it's no longer who they are and it's no longer controlling what they do. That's real power, that's what I invite people into, and that's it from that place, they don't need me anymore.
Gill Moakes (27:11.565)
Absolutely.
Gill Moakes (27:24.758)
Yeah.
Gill Moakes (27:30.761)
Right, right. So thinking, just thinking about something you said, which was that, you know, this isn't therapy, this is coaching. But I think that as I listened to you, there are elements of this that do sound quite therapeutic to me. And I'm interested, I suppose, in what kind of problems do are typical of the things that you deal with, with this kind of coaching?
you know, what kind of things do you work with your clients around?
Kim (28:06.306)
So you're right, it's therapeutic, it's not therapy. It's definitely therapeutic. I've had clients that have come to me that have had therapy, have had sports psychology, have had psychotherapy, have had hypnosis, have had all these things, and they've helped for a point, but because they're working in their excellent modalities of healing for people, but the limit I've seen is that they get to a certain point, but the loop still happens because they're still running the same deeper programs. So.
Gill Moakes (28:09.694)
Mm.
Gill Moakes (28:34.927)
Yeah.
Kim (28:35.766)
There's no therapeutic steps or stages or what's the word, mind games, etc. to put into place. It's individualized and it's organic and it's basically it's coaching which means the person, the client does the work. I'm there to hold the space for them and guide them when necessary but because they do the work, they have the realizations. They then go away and integrate those realizations.
Gill Moakes (28:46.316)
Yeah.
Gill Moakes (28:50.215)
Yeah.
Gill Moakes (28:55.434)
Mm.
Kim (29:06.166)
then they're deciding how that goes because they are them and they are in their life and I'm there to support them doing that. This is coaching. It's therapeutic coaching, but it's not therapy in that respect. In terms of who I work with, I work with professional athletes around procrastination, people pleasing, limiting themselves to anxiety and fear and various other aspects of that.
I work with individuals, mainly women. I do work with men as well. I seem to attract a lot of women and I work with business leaders. And they all come with their own problem. So some of them, it may be, I just want to focus on my relationship. I may want to focus on my career. I want to focus on my health. But through the process of coaching, it transpired all areas of their life. The common things that I see would be procrastination. That's very common.
Gill Moakes (29:55.905)
Mm.
Kim (30:03.15)
I can't stop doing it, don't understand why they do it. I've tried various things to stop doing it, but it doesn't work. People pleasing.
Gill Moakes (30:12.061)
Yep, we're back to that prisons of the mind, aren't we? Those primal prisons.
Kim (30:15.106)
Prisons of the mind people, yeah, yeah. Basically, these are all not, people come with these things because this is my problem. I can't let this thing go. I can't let go of the control. I can't not put 500 things on my to-do list and then beat myself up because I didn't do them. I can't let go of whatever it may be, as I said, but the thing, the problem is not the problem. It's the behavioral adaptation to the problem. And the problem is a perception.
So there's quite a wide range of things that I help people with that they would be the most common anxiety, fear, procrastination, imposter syndrome is a common one, particularly in entrepreneurs and coaches and business leaders and it limits people. You were speaking before with regards to the problems coaches have when they come out of coaching school and they've set their website up and they've got and they want to go do the thing but they don't know how to or they're held back by well what if it fails?
What if people realize I'm actually rubbish coach? What if people realize I'm just not good enough? What if the whole thing's come crashing down and I have no money because I'm living in a box of scarcity? What if I'm just not safe if I put myself out? Yeah, but we don't, yeah, I mean, we might do it openly or we might just be running in the back of our mind, but it's limiting us. Yeah, so that's probably why I was able to do what I did because I wasn't running those programs anymore.
Gill Moakes (31:25.569)
That's it. Catastrophizing right, left and center.
Gill Moakes (31:32.605)
Hmm.
Gill Moakes (31:36.727)
Bye.
Kim (31:42.258)
So this is the kind of things that I help business leaders and coaches particularly with get out of their own way without tools and tricks and start to explore what life looks like and from that from that space. Yeah.
Gill Moakes (31:58.025)
Amazing. I think that what is incredible to me is that your journey to doing this really deep work has been so organic, hasn't it? It's really like an incredibly natural linear, it sounds linear, I'm sure it doesn't feel like it was very linear when you were living it, but it really does sound it as you describe it and that you know you underwent your own transformation and realised that
or certainly felt called to bring about that for other people.
What's next for you? So what's, what's happening with the business now? What are your plans? What's, what's the dream for you in your own business?
Kim (32:46.382)
So I'm living the dream, I'm already there. And I'm fully committed and fully, what's the word, fully committed and all attached to outcomes. So I am committed to growing my business because I am committed to helping as many people as possible in whatever way that looks like, okay. So I'm happy and I'm committed to growing, yeah. So I have aspirations and I have ambitions and I have dreams, not because I'm trying to get somewhere because I'm already there, but I can.
Gill Moakes (32:49.174)
Yeah!
Gill Moakes (33:06.609)
I love that. Mm.
Kim (33:15.894)
do more and I'm going to enjoy doing that. So that's where I come from.
Gill Moakes (33:19.965)
Isn't that the best motivation to grow a business is my, I need to grow my business to accommodate all of the people I want to help. And I always think that's such a brilliant frame to look at it through, rather than I want to grow my business to make more money. I need to grow my business because it has to be bigger in order to accommodate all of the people I want to help is just, I love that.
Kim (33:28.494)
Hmm.
Kim (33:40.738)
Yeah.
Gill Moakes (33:48.809)
And I think as coaches, that should always be our frame for looking at our businesses. It's why we're in business, right?
Kim (34:00.975)
Mm-hmm. Absolutely. It goes back to, you know, serve first. Serve first. And I add to that is love first. And it might sound a little bit easy to tell it, but what I mean by that is, like, remember the passion that brought you into this. Remember the passion that drives you to do what you're doing and to put yourself out there and to help people in the way that we can.
Gill Moakes (34:05.269)
Yep, absolutely.
Kim (34:24.802)
Hold on to that and remember that in everything that you're doing. And if you bring that into whatever projects we're doing, whatever we're creating in terms of workshops or group things or individual coaching, putting the person that you're helping first and foremost, and whether that be a group of people or one individual, you're never going to fail because that's what people want. People want to be heard. They want to be seen and they want it to be okay.
Gill Moakes (34:24.83)
Mm.
Gill Moakes (34:47.617)
Couldn't agree more.
Gill Moakes (34:54.99)
Mmm.
Kim (34:55.662)
they want to be feel safe, they want to feel okay, they want to feel enough, but they want to be seen and heard in this world and there's very few I find opportunities in this world where you can come to either a workshop or a coaching space where it's about you but not in a scary way. It's about you to be you and to explore who you is in the absence of who you feel you should be or you need to be.
Gill Moakes (35:21.501)
Yeah, yeah, absolutely.
Kim (35:23.682)
And so I almost feel I have a responsibility now that I have the skills that I have and experience that I have to try and help as many people as possible to experience that in their own life, particularly with women I find because, you know, we're mothers, we're sisters, we're daughters, we're household owners, we're business leaders, we're all of it. And when you start with us, you know, the ripple effect is...
is incredible. That's not discounting men. Men are awesome and I love working with men for a whole totally different set of reasons. And what I found when you work with women is the ripple effect is endless. So yeah, absolutely.
Gill Moakes (36:07.709)
Yeah, I think that's true. I agree with you. So if anyone's listening now and they want to learn more about what you do, which I know they will, where should they, where can they find you? Where can they find out more?
Kim (36:22.786)
So the easiest place to be my website, nice and simple, drkimwilson.com. So that explains what I do, how I do it, how to contact me, it's all on there. And there's a way to contact me directly and or book a free discovery call if you're called to do so through there as well. I'm on Instagram, Facebook, LinkedIn, a lot of it. Thank you.
Gill Moakes (36:28.141)
Perfect!
Gill Moakes (36:45.029)
I'll put all the links in the show notes for sure. Yeah, absolutely.
Kim (36:49.97)
Yeah, yeah, you can just Google Dr. Kim Wilson. It comes up almost at the top of Google, as well as Emma, my shiny green top. You'll find me quite easily. It's either gonna be shiny green or shiny orange. I'm a colorful person, you'll notice me.
Gill Moakes (36:53.451)
Yeah.
Gill Moakes (36:57.121)
Wonderful. In the shiny green top everyone look out for the shiny green top. Oh Kim thank you so much it's been a really great it's been great to talk to you today and I think that I have a lots of conversations with lots of coaches and I never you are sorry Lena I'm rambling.
I have lots of conversations with lots of coaches and you stand out to me as someone who is incredibly passionate about what you do and you're very genuine as well, you're really genuine about that desire to, it comes from a desire to help. Um, and I think that really radiates out of you. So thank you for coming on and sharing all of that with us. I really appreciate it. Oh, absolutely true.
Kim (37:47.982)
Thank you. Thank you. It means a lot. Thank you. Yeah. Thank you for having me.
Gill Moakes (37:55.229)
You're welcome. Thanks so much. Bye for now.
